27 March - 2 April 2015 #751

The human connection

A combination of leadership skills and ability to communicate are correlated with success
Anjana Rajbhandary

Hi again,

Many of us love the sound of our own voice, but to really know people, we need to stop and listen. We need to pay attention to their words, actions and how they are (or aren’t) looking at you. In today’s world, we are just so self-absorbed and selfish that we have stopped appreciating other people, maybe we are taking the ‘each man for himself’ concept a bit too far. People are quite transparent actually, it’s not hard to tell the real from the fake, as long as we take the time to really look, observe and learn. You can read anyone if you make a little effort and think beyond yourself. Keep your questions coming.

I am available at [email protected] or @AnjyRajy

How do I develop my communication skills since I cannot communicate properly with others? Is there something wrong with me?


AR: A combination of leadership skills and ability to communicate are correlated with success. Think of people you look up to, I am sure they have impressive communication skills.

Communication is more than just talking, it has a lot to do with listening, asking questions, paying attention to details such as body language, tone of voice and the environment. You have to understand that communication is a two-way street, and that you will have to learn to adapt and be patient.

To be a good communicator, you have to let go of your ego and be empathetic, try to understand the other person. It is paying attention to the details of the other person such as sensing their mood, attitude and values instead of just hearing the sound of their voice. It is necessary to make the other person feel important to really communicate.

It also helps to be personal, it makes you more human and relatable. People don’t really care how much you know till they know how much you care, learn to make the other person feel validated by focusing on the subject at hand. Have a balance in the exchange of information. When delivering your own message, try to be specific and consistent. It is a skill that we need in both our personal and professional life.

The good news is that we can all practise and better our communication skills. Good luck.

Anjana is a certified mental health rehabilitation technician and has four years of experience in adult mental health in Maine, USA.

Blog: anjyrajy.wordpress.com

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