Nepali Times
ASS
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ASS


Two quotes of the week. The first one from Comrade God (alias Deb Gurung) who, when asked when YCL extortion will stop, replied: "We're only doing what the other parties have always been doing." Second quote from Comrade Awesome (aka Pushpa Kamal Dahal) in Pokhara: "We have disallowed forced donations. If it is happening I will look into the matter and urge my party people to stop it."

...

Here are some more nuggets from The Fierce One over the years:
"We are willing to accept the monarchy if the people vote for it." (2006)
"We want to get rid of the monarchy before elections." (2007)
"We are even ready to accept restoration of the dissolved House of
Representatives if the seven parties say so." (Feb 2006)
"We don't believe in a parliamentary system." (Last week)
"We revolutionaries believe in collective leadership, we don't like the
trappings of power." (2006)
"I will be president in two years\' time." (2006)

...

Ever wondered how our seven-party leaders spent the last ten days during which they were supposed to come up with a consensus before the winter session of the interim parliament reconvenes? They were too busy dealing with the YCL who beat up the Nobel doctors in which Girjau's daughter and cousin were on opposite sides of the dispute. The Maoists got dragged into it, and Comrade Ananta packed the docs off to Kami Danda for a good thrashing.

When the fhit hit the san, Comrade Laldhoj got Comrade Sagar to be the fall guy so Ananta could get off the hook and then got the Nobel promoter to go live on Kantipur TV to deny he ever went to the YCL to ask for help. These were the grave matters of state that were being discussed at the top secret meetings in Baluwatar, and you thought they were trying to iron out their differences on electoral procedures and republic. Ha.

It's not the seven party disunity that intrigues the Ass so much as the back-stabbing between First Daughter and First Cousin. The old man seems happy to use the two flesh-and-bloods for his two-track strategy to deal with everyone from the Indians to the Maoists. Comrade Shekhar got an earful in Delhi about GP's obduracy and brought this message home to Uncle. But the old fox is sitting tight.

...

Now that Awesome has shown what an ageist he is by telling Girjau he is too old, Makunay just can't wait to be PM and is hopping up and down in anticipation. If Awesome hands him Baluwatar on a platter Makunay won't refuse. That will be the end of the UML. Poor Oliji has been trying to warn his party not to fall into the Maoist trap but to no avail. Finally it becomes clear why the Maoists resigned from government: with Comrade Sitaula and Comrade Bamdeb they have both bases covered.

...

The six parties just don't get it. The Maoists' main complaint is that the parties have stolen their slogans. We fought for a constituent assembly election, now everyone wants one, they say. We wanted a republic, now everyone wants to abolish the monarchy. The Maoists need to show they are different, so the UML's slogans can't sound more radical than theirs. If they want to end the deadlock, the six parties should respect the Maoists' intellectual property right on the Federal Democratic Republic of Nepal.

...

It isn't just Comrade Ass, it seems, who found Jan Erik Wilhelmson's salute from the podium and the six-gun salute at the Maoist army anniversary marchpast at Shaktikhor a bit incongruous. It raised not a few diplo eyebrows, too. Hey, aren't those guns supposed to be inside the containers? So Comrade Jan Erik inspects the guard of honour and a six gun salute in the same week that the new Maoist demand of integration of the PLA with the NA comes up and just as UNMIN says it wants to be involved in SSR post-elections.

...

Two more Comrade Fearsome quotes from last week. "We may go back to the jungle." (Thursday in Chitwan). "We will not abandon seven party unity." (Friday in Pokhara).

ass@nepalitimes.com



LATEST ISSUE
638
(11 JAN 2013 - 17 JAN 2013)


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