Nepali Times
ASS
Backside
Frog weddings

ASS


In these times of great uncertainty, when trust in government is at an all-time low, it is gratifying to note that there are a few things we can still rely on. I'm of course speaking about employing frogs as rainmakers.

On Tuesday, the people of Dolakha arranged an elaborate frog wedding with bride and bridegroom coming out of hibernation to tie the nuptial knots of holy matrimony at a local temple. The ceremony was followed by a lavish jeri soiree banquet for invited human guests from surrounding villages. And on Wednesday, while the amphibians were enjoying a honeymoon, a massive thunderstorm dumped rain on Dolakha. Thank heavens there are still things that work in this country.

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Must say our prime minister is really on his toes. The other day he told a bunch of businessmen he was "thinking of doing something" about the power cuts. This is the kind of decisiveness we need in this country. It has been seven months since the government announced it would generate 10,000 megawatts of power in the next ten years, and Nepal's electricity generation has actually dropped in that period. At this rate, there will be 25 hours of daily power cuts next winter. Since we can't rely on the government to do something about this, time for us to arrange a mass wedding of fireflies so we get the power back. Nothing else is going to work.

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Comrade Tremendousness has his fingers crossed nothing happens again to cancel his rescheduled visit to Scandinavia next week. Eye brows are already being raised that he is leaving the day before parliament reconvenes since the legislature is supposed to address the Tharu and indigenous peoples' issue that paralysed the country for two weeks. The first draft of the new constitution is also supposed to get a reading in the house.

The Ass still can't understand the desperation to go on foreign jaunts when fences need to be urgently mended on the southern front, and the multiple-emergencies at home are even more serious than the last time the visit was put off.

***

Come to think of it, what happened to the promise not to attend any more inaugurations and speaking engagements? Just this week, PKD has found time to grace three ribbon-cuttings, two award ceremonies and watch a football match at the invitation of the Republican Sports Federation. Which is probably why he blew a gasket when he found out that his colleague, Comrade Cloudy, had actually signed the extension of the tenures of the eight generals on Sunday. He asked that the files be brought to Baluwatar for safe-keeping and gave the Secretary-in-Chief, Defence Secretary and the PMO Secretary a right royal dressing down for not telling him about it first. And the army, thinking this was a routine matter, sent a jeep over to the defence ministry to collect the signed files but was told there was a glitch. Smelling a rat, Chief Sab tried to call The Fierce One all day, but the prime minister decided to stay out of reach at the PLA gathering at Naya Bajar.

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Are the kangresis finally thinking of joining the govt? This is the speculation that has given grist to Kathmandu's rumour mills. The internationals had always been pressing for it, and now it looks like that is the msg that Girjau also got when he allowed the Indians to feel his pulse in Delhi last week. But the old man is said to be bargaining for a plum post for his dotter, maybe even DPM, before giving the nod.

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The Indians are rattled enough about the Baddie-Chini Bhai-Bhai to send a not-so-veiled warning to Kathmandu by giving the Kingji-Sonia meeting wide play. Contrary to media reports, however, Sonia's real interest in the meeting was to dissuade the ex-king from any mischief with the BJP during the current Indian election campaign. The added bonus for MEA was that it also sent a signal to the Baddies in KTM that the royalty could be resurrected if they didn't behave themselves.

ass(at)nepalitimes.com



LATEST ISSUE
638
(11 JAN 2013 - 17 JAN 2013)


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