Good to know that Doha's The Peninsula in its Saturday edition prominently carried the news that Emir Sheikh Hamad bin Khalifa Al Thani had sent a cable congratulating His Majesty the King of Nepal on his happy birthday. What's more, the paper duly noted that the Qatari heir apparent, His Highness Sheikh Tamim bin Hamad Al Thani also sent a congratulatory cablegram to HM the K of N.
Not to be outscooped, down the Gulf Coast the Khaleej Times of Dubai also carried a front page item about His Highness Shaikh Mohammend bin Rashid of the United Arab Emirates congratulating our kingji on his birthday.
The Ass was struck by two things when he spied these items. One, they still send telegrams? And two, why did the heir apparent send the cable to Gyanendra and not to our heir apparent, Paras. A hidden message there from oil sheikhs to our sheikhs? Apparently.
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Either way, the news item made some of us here slightly nostalgic for the good old days when The Rising Nepal used to reserve a space on the upper left-hand corner of page one every day for similar congratulatory messages sent by our majesty to other majesties, potentates, fellow tinpot dictators, and other tyrants.The Ass is glad to note that these loktantrick times, the space on The Rising New Nepal these days is about Crown Prince and Heir Apparent Prakash being feted in the People's Republic of China. Or news items headlined: 'Govt Takes Decision&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'&#'216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;216;', 'Condolences Expressed', or 'Scribes' Body Revived'. Who says we haven't made progress towards a New Nepal?
But to give credit where it is due, the Ass felicitates The Rising Nepal for turning a new leaf, coming out in a new slicker design and cutting down on newsprint in these austere times by trimming size. But most of all, we are happy we no longer have to read verbatim transcripts of congratulatory royal telegrams to the Swazi king anymore.
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Nothing proves the resilient spirit of us Nepalis more than the way we can grin and bear every new shortage. When the government said, sorry, no electricity we said fine we'll make do with candles. Then the taps went dry and we said who needs water anyway, we'll just use toilet paper.When the 7+1 government said, oops, no petroleum we dutifully queued in lines so long that the cars waiting at Sajha in Pulchok snaked right down to Inar, back to Patan Dhoka, cut across Krishna Galli until the tail got entangled with the head and no one could make head or tail of where it started and where it ended. There is still no petrol, but instead of rioting, we open the hatch on our Maruti and play marriage with other taxi-drivers.
Now it looks like there is a shortage of cash. Since the governor of Rastra Bank has been framed and arrested there is no one to sign the new banknotes (being printed in Indonesia) so there will be a huge cash crunch. Which is a good thing because with nothing to buy, who needs cash anyway?
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Getting difficult to keep track of all these new outfits springing up in the eastern tarai. It was bad enough with the Madhes Tiger, Tarai Cobra, Python X, Jwala, and Goit. At the rate they are splintering into criminal gangs, it wouldn't surprise us to have new militant groups called Rautahat Rhinos, Hosiarpur Hornbills, or Siraha Scorpions.And just as UNMIN is getting ready to destroy the maobadi IEDs comes news of yet another faction of the JTMM calling itself 'Bisfot'. This is the story of Nepal these days: you defuse one bomb and another one goes off under our collective asses.
ass@nepalitimes.com 
