One of the indicators that the Nepali economy is on the mend is the phenomenal growth in recent years of this country's advertising industry. And thank heavens for that, because this week's column is brought to you by Crackpot Cheeseballs (Tagline: "Do you have the balls?") and by Virgin Whiskey (Slogan: "Nothing is as satisfactory as a virgin.")

And as we can see from these real-life politically correct announcements, humour and jocularity play an important role in the art of ad copy writing. Our advertising industry now ranks right up there with the world's best in terms of using the device of comedy to sell fast-moving consumer goods. In fact, these products are moving so fast, we have no time to loaf around. (This previous sentence was sponsored by: Sagarmatha Loaf: "You Have Dough? We Got Bread.")

As we can see, co-branding through product placement is another innovative way for the media to get manufacturers to attract the attention of clients, since we need to anticipate their every desire, even if it means bribing them with a motorcycle to eat prawn crackers. (Sponsor's announcement: "In every packet of Junkfood Industries Prawn Crackles find a masculine 480cc Flying Horse Brand Motorcycle.")

Competition is fierce, and we in the media have to be innovative and ready to offer incentives and rewards to loyal customers.

And that includes yours truly, which is why this week's column comes with this special promo offer: "First person to read this piece right to the end, gets a free diamond-studded tiara. Fine print: Lots of conditions apply. Offer valid till stocks last. Strictly on first-come-first-serve basis. Management can disqualify entrants without giving any reason whatsoever. In short, this is just a ploy to get suckers like you who have nothing better to do to keep reading on so that you are forced to go through this list of our sponsors for the current column which was brought to you by:"

No-Itch Anti-Eczema Lotion: "Special Scratch Offer. Scrape this sticker and win a free trip to Disneyland."

Sloth Beer Grand Pre-Dasain Promo: "Drink all you can to be the lucky winner of a college scholarship, and pass out."

Mt Everest Iron Rods: "Don't Stay Home Without It. Buy a 50 ton gift pack, and win a free mountain flight for two."

Old Smuggler Whisky: "The Smooth, Supple Taste of 100% Contraband Liquor. Give Us An Inch, And We'll Take a Yard."

E-coli Brand Mineral Water and Weight-Loss Formula: "Bottled at source from a tap in Tinkune and fortified with micro-organic nutrients. This two-in-one product allows you to quench your thirst and shed kilos simultaneously."

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