Nepali Times
Life Times
The King's Speech


No …I am not talking about Gyanu Uncle's last speech as the 'last King' of Nepal! The movie is about Prince Albert and later King George VI of them British Empire and his 'stammering' and the Australian guy who helped him to speak without bhak-bhaka-ing!

I do hope...someday...our Nepali film-makers will also do a movie about our 'House of Shah'. I really want to see the last 24 hours before 'King Gyanendra Bir Bikram Shah Dev' threw in the towel and finished his last cigarette inside 'Narayanhiti Palace' and said '#$%@ it...I am leaving...for now.' If only them King's men read some books about them 'British Monarchy' or them 'Pad Thai' monarchy then things would have turned out for better hola ni!

Some day …if we ever make a movie about 'Gyanu' Uncle …we need to get Geoffrey Rush, he can play anybody. Don't worry …he is them actor's actor ki kay bhancha ni. He will probably learn Nepali in 3 weeks, wear them daura-surwal and do them 'Namastey' too!

The movie is about the man who went on to become a King but along the way...he got some help with his 'stammering' from a failed actor and speech therapist! In the end...a common man helps the 'Raja' ... so let us all be thankful to them 'little' people who have made them so-called 'great' people...great, by either helping them to overcome their stammer or cook for them or wash their clothes or clean their rooms …lastuh ma ga-re-ruh...we all do our part ni!

So our great civil servants are now planning to climb Everest rey! And them expedition ko kharcha is around Rs 3 crores rey! And who is footing the bill? As always, it's us...the 'poor' taxpayers ni! I think we should have the 'Everest' clause in our new constitution!

What? Like …if you want to be the Prime-Monster then you will have to climb Everest first... or something like that …I think Baburam could do it! And since Kamal Thapa is a big-tyam fitness freak …he could also finish the 'Everest' race hola!

Maybe they can do them joint expedition hola ni …a little bit of Left and a little bit of Right... we better find someone who follows them middle path or something like that or else …we are doomed forever hola!

And our great President is having fun in Kuwait with them military parades and what not! Hope he gets some medal sedal from the Sheiks...something like 'El-Amir Great Wanderer of the East' title sitle!

What the @$#! is he doing in Kuwait? Them Kuwaitis even sent them private plane for our Prezzi rey! I think it's about tyam our President had his own 'Air Force One' like Obama! We could give him one of them NAC ko old twin-otters...heheh! Or maybe he just wants some tyam off … before the 'President's Rule' begins!

And what's up with our netas visiting them schools in Lalitpur ko gau sau and using them helicopters? Yestai ho...spend our money like it's your bau ko dhukuti ni! Kuirey lay bhanchan ni …'Make them Hay say while them Sun Shines'...the sun is shining on them netas while the rest of us are caught in the middle of them freaking tornado sornado!

The 7-point disagreement

(11 JAN 2013 - 17 JAN 2013)