Nepali Times
Gleneagles Summit


Didn't Girjau just go to S'pore on Monday, and isn't he returning on Sunday? Don't PKD and GPK get together every other day at Maharajganj anyway? And each time after every meeting don't they express their commitment to resolve their differences by forging yet another high-level political mechanism to break the deadlock? Then what was the need for a Singapore Summit? Is there something even beyond the Ass' surveillance radar going on here?

Or did something path-breaking really happen on the seventh floor VIP room at Gleneagles Hospital? We will know only if the govt indeed falls as Awesome predicted as soon as he got back. If it doesn't, then we could legitimately ask who paid for the Maoists' roundtrip on Royal Silk Class and who paid for GPK's Learjet air ambulance.


The bizarre nature of the Singapore shuttle has set a lot of tongues wagging and a lot of speculation flying about why Singapore. OK, Prof Muni is a visiting faculty member at LKW but does he have to be a facilitator for a secret power-sharing pow-wow? That seems to be stretching it, and methinks the professor is floating that rumour himself to boost his image as kingless Nepal's kingmaker. Besides, GPK and PKD are united by their common interest in weakening Makunay, their mistrust of the Indians and the shared allergy for President Ram Baron. They don't really need an ex-JNU prof to expedite things, therefore.


So that leaves us with the only possible explanation for the Gleneagles Summit: the self- importance of these two leaders. With eternity staring at him in the face, GPK is finally worried about his legacy. The image of the great statesman that he cultivated during 2006 has now been whittled away by his later opportunism and willingness to sleep with the enemy just so his dotter could be deputy PM. The most unpopular leader in Nepal after king G just got more unpopular and the old man wants one last chance to launder his reputation by fixing the political deadlock. We would never be in the soup we are in now if we only had let Girjau be president last year. He took it out on all of us, and still hasn't quite forgiven us.


Now there is noone left to blame, and he wants to fix things before he goes. And Makunay must be feeling his days are numbered cos he just named Cousin Bikupa as consul general to Hong Kong.

One has to hand it to the Maobaddies, the comrades are serious about corruption control. And what an ingenious way they have found to go about it. Those who bemoan the delay in passing the budget miss the point. Since so much of the budget is embezzled, by not letting parliament function to ratify the budget, the Maoist have removed the biggest source of corruption in the country. If there is no budget, there can be no corruption, hoina?


If the Mule hadn't actually seen the circular DfID sent out to its partners recently, it would never have believed it. With a new surge in Baddie extortion being reported nationwide, the department fell over backwards to justify it by saying by way of preamble: "we have to understand that the UCPN-M have expenses and have to take care of their cadre" or words to that effect. With an agency from a democratic country that would never tolerate political violence on its own soil justifying extortion here, who needs enemies?


Here's this week's most interesting vacancy ad. It's sure to set off a stampede outside the Norwegian embassy for a Specialist Visa.


Nepali Brahmin Priest Recently resettled Bhutani refugees in Alta, Norway, need a Brahmin priest pronto to officiate all annaprasans, bratmans and bihays. Should be a god-fearing vegetarian who can read the stars of the northern hemisphere and work for extended periods above the Arctic Circle.

Interested candidates should apply with references from all three political parties.


(11 JAN 2013 - 17 JAN 2013)