Nepali Times
ASS
Backside
Let us bray

ASS


Even as tabloids this week exposed the details of how Paras sircar had to scrounge around to raise the Rs 1.6 million compensation (Daddy apparently didn't chip in) for the widow of musician Pravin Gurung after he allegedly ran over him near the Yak & Yeti seven years ago, came news that the crownless prince has got bored hanging around at Gokarna and is back to his old ways roughing up people at watering holes in the capital.

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The Ass was glad to see that not getting an American transit visa didn't deter Suresh Ale Magar from flying off on a junket to Peru recently. The trip was paid for by the Americans, ironically enough, although Suresh Dai says the Swiss took care of his part of the ticket and per diem. Be that as it may, the delegation met Peruvian civil society, peace monitors, and human rights organisations involved in truth and reconciliation. The Nepalis even flew off to the Andean altiplano to the town of Ayacucho and the university where Abimael Guzman taught. Ale was so moved to be in the cradle of the Shining Path that he started singing praises of Prachanda Path, about the common struggle of the Peruvian and Nepali people for the cause of World Revolution and how violence is justified in a political struggle. Needless to say, there weren't many takers among his Peruano hosts for Guruji's end-justifies-the-means line of reasoning.

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The Nepali media survived the sycophantic Panchayat era toeing the royal line, lived through the post-1990 period when every new elected government used state media shamelessly as a propaganda tool and even after 2002 when KingG turned Radio Nepal, NTV, and Gorkhapatra into his mouth organs.

Now that we have a Minister of Incommunicado belonging to the Maoist persuasion, one expected him to revolutionise things. Nope. Maharababu has inducted (if that's the right word) four comrades into Radio Nepal and actually argued at a cabinet meeting that he should be allowed to do it because that was what the NC and UML did when they controlled the ministry. Makes perfect sense: they ate donkey manure why can't I?

On World Press Freedom Day the minister also shot himself in the foot by delivering a convoluted justification for past assassination of journalists by his party. All this was duly reported in excruciating detail by His Master\'s Voice on NTV\'s evening news. Let us pray.

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Speaking of the eight parties, none except the foreign minister bothered to show up for the official EU Day function at the Hyatt on Wednesday. Don't they know the Europeans have just doubled aid and are basically bankrolling the elections? Not that any of you is asking the Ass, but if you did I'd say we're getting a tad too dependent on donors. The NC's district president meeting this week was paid for by the Indians. Now that the kangresi netas are used to flying Yeti, you can be sure they ain't gonna take night buses to party conventions no more. Even the UML had no qualms about having their recent conclave sponsored by Scandies. Who's paying for the new helipad at Baluwatar, eh?

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So, like the Ass, all of you thought Sita Ram Yechury had come to check up on the progress of the peace process? Ha! Fooled ya'll. It's no coincidence that soon after the visit, we heard that GMR had won the bids to explore both Upper Karnali and Arun III. Congrats, Chandrababu.

One recent proof that absolute power corrupts absolutely is that Naryanhiti hasn't paid its power bills for the past few years. And those power-hungry chappies didn't even have to suffer loadshedding! No wonder Comrade Sita Ram wants a republic.

ass@nepalitimes.com



LATEST ISSUE
638
(11 JAN 2013 - 17 JAN 2013)


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