The maoists and madhesis may be at each other's throats in the tarai, but in parliament they are shoulder to shoulder raising fists and shouting slogans. Strange bedfellows.
The comrades are supposed to have taken donor-funded tuition classes on parliamentary behaviour from veteran MPs last week. They were coached on how to raise objections from the floor without using four-letter words, the etiquette of table thumping without brandishing a handgun, and the elaborate rituals of speaking at Zero Hour about Year Zero.
But they must have flunked the course because the honourable Grey Coats have taken the practice of gheraoing the rostrum to an unprecedented level of theatrics. After watching the MPs grinning at tv cameras this week, the Ass is willing to bet that if the media is kept out of the chambers no one would bother to gherao the Speaker.
Speaking of the speaker, you should have seen the Honourable Mr Nembang stifling a yawn and walking out in disgust as the MPs went through their daily ritual of mistaking the rostrum for Ratna Park. Just as well the Speaker is off on an IPO jaunt, poor man needs a break.
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So Comrade Sitaula has been hospitalised with hearing problems in his right ear. Come to think of it, the Ass had noticed symptoms ever since he became Home Minister last year. And when the madhesis clamoured for his resignation, he just didn't listen did he? In fact he was retained as minister of interior in the interim government at the insistence of Comrade Awesome. We all thought Sitaula was being stubborn, now we know the man couldn't hear a thing. We wish the minister speedy recovery. I SAID WE WISH YOU SPEEDY RECOVERY......
Last week, the Ass raised the issue of our Maoist ministers keeping two body guards. Now, several alert readers have drawn his attention to the fact that COAS Gen Katuwal has taken a great leap forward by having a female bodyguard. Award the jarsap another star for inclusiveness and demolishing stereotypes. Still another reader notes seeing Minister Deb Gurung taking both his body guards into a Buddha Air flight recently. The comrade sat on seat 2 A while 3A and 3 B were taken up by his two bodyguards (both male). The Maoist guard in fact was carrying a firearm in full view of fellow-passengers. Hey, what are the containers for?.....
Of all the full-time professionals in our civilian society movement, Padma Ratan Kaka has been a fixture even before the 1990 uprising. Whether it is workers carrying out a talabandi on a hotel, revolutionaries doing talabandis on schools, or activists marching for a Newar Autonomous Republic you can be sure Padma Ratan Dai will be there. And sure enough there he was last week outside the US Embassy handing out Puntay Rios to DV pidits after convincing them to call off their fast on to death.It had been a decade or more since we had seen Kamred Tuladhar cry in public. But there he was wishing Vladimir Ilyich happy 130th birthday last week at the BICC when he broke down and wept while delivering his homily to the Father of the October Revolution. The audience was so moved the man got a standing ovation. Yus!
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Kingji just doesn't give up, does he? While the rest of the country is getting ready to usher in a Loktantrick Republic he is determined to keep his country a Tantrick Kingdom by appeasing the gods with the sacrifice of five animals at Dakshinkali. The astrologers told him to conduct the sacrifices on Tuesday, which also happened to be Loktantra Day in order to put a voodoo curse on the anniversary celebrations at the Army Pavilion on Tundikhel. His Ex-Majesty got the royal praetorian guards to clear the route to Pharping and even got the army band to strike up God Save the King on the occasion. Wait a minute, isn't the army now supposed to be under a civilian chain of command?
