Thanks to the yeoman's service imparted by our country's current rulers in the past year, we can say with confidence that things can't get any worse. Therefore, if my memory serves me right, things can only get better.

That is why you may have gleaned from recent coverage in the The Rising Damp that we are all bubbling with optimism about the future. We have started seeing the glass as half-full and that is largely due to the fact that we have already quaffed the other half. Everything looks rosy on the sunny side of the street because we are wearing rose-tinted shades. We clearly detect a silver lining that wasn't there before in cloud cuckooland. And as we confidently sail underneath a rainbow towards a glorious sunset we know all this has been made possible because we have locked up all pessimists under the Terrorism and Disruptive Activities Act (TADA!).

And allow me to take this opportunity to also propose a vote of thanks to the large numbers of yeomen and women who have demonstrated courage, commitment and patriotism in the year 2062 and who I'm sure will be recognised and awarded medals in the New Year's Honour's List.

So, with permission from the Chair (May I?) allow me to propose the following richly-deserving candidates for decorations: soldiers who courageously marched into newsrooms last year to ensure that all the news was good news; daring dogs of Pokhara Municipality who fearlessly stood as candidates in the recently successfully-concluded elections; Herojig, the cartoonist extraordinaire and member of UNACOOTS; and since everyone from the good old days is coming out of the woodworks why not also give a medal to the shoplifting Royal Nepalese Ambassador and Kleptomaniac Plenipotentiary who exercised his diplomatic impunity and whose service to the nation has remained unrecognised for over two decades and a half?

It is when we start recognising every Nepali who has tirelessly worked for the betterment of this country that we will set an example for others to follow. And I'll start right here by developing a positive mental attitude myself and not poking fun anymore at those on top of the food chain. So, here is a rundown of all the upbeat things that have been happening lately which may help us count our blessings:

. Kulekhani reservoir has risen by 1.7 cm due to recent rains which means loadshedding will now be reduced from 5 hours a day to 4 hours and 57 minutes a day.
. Another contingent of RNA peacekeeping troops has left for the Congo where it will try to win the hearts and minds of the Congolese people who overwhelmingly yearn for a ceasefire, the restoration of peace, democracy and respect for human rights.
. Kathmandu has held its First Chicken or Egg Festival which proved once and for all eggs came first and there is no bird flew in the country.
. Two potholes were patched in Krishna Galli this week, which is a 200 percent improvement on the situation in the previous fiscal year when no potholes were patched.
. A new Bikram Calendar has been approved by the Department of Astrology and Voodoo that will eliminate the month of Baisakh in 2063 since that is the month when most political upheavals have historically taken place in this country.
. The Nepal Telepathy Corporation has introduced a new service called Sixth Sense (Registered Trade Mark) for voice mail in which subscribers will have to use their intuition and instinct to figure out what callers are trying to say since they keep getting cut off.