Chairman Awe-inspiring never ceases to inspire awe and wonder among friends and foe alike. But PKD's renowned multi-forked tongue is now getting so tangled up that he has outdone Orwell with his doublespeak, graduating to triplespeak and beyond. A Kathmandu tabloid has tabulated recent PKD statements:
15 November: "
Kangres should first agree on a PM candidate"
19 November:
"Let's have a technocratic PM"
29 November:
"Only a Madhesi PM is acceptable"
1 December:
"A Kangresi PM even for one day"
15 December:
"We will have a consensus
govt by tomorrow"
16 December:
"Who said a Kangresi
PM is acceptable?"
20 December:
"How about Badal as PM?"
22 December:
"I can't convince Baburam,
you try to talk to him"
1 January:
"If no agreement, let's revive the CA"

The eternal search for Nepal's new PM has come a full circle with BRB visiting civil society leader Devendra Dai and Gutch making a house call on Demon Nath at their respective residences this week. The two were naturally rather flattered that they are being considered to be pradhan monkeys. Which leads the Donkey to wonder why it wasn't offered the post too. Remember that a technocrat PM was originally an idea Awesome floated in order to have a hand-picked loyalist, and he later gave up that proposal in favour of Jhusil Kira because he thought the Kangres leader would be more malleable. Now, BRB has hijacked the idea of a civil society PM knowing fully well that it will be shot down by the UML, NC, and even PKD himself and doesn't have the chance of a snowflake in hell to be implemented. Our PhD PM threw a red herring to prolong his incumbency till February and everyone fell for it. Sheer genius.

If your business hasn't yet received a letter signed by Baidya Daddy and Cloudy Uncle asking for a 10 lack donation then maybe you are not important enough to be noticed, and should make a career switch. The Cash Baddies and the Dash Baddies have stepped up the fund-raising competition for their respective Conventions in the coming weeks. The Dash Baddies are gearing up for their jamgat on Push 25, so their request is more urgent. The letters are usually followed by phone calls where the exact amount is specified, and the threat unspecified. Along New Road, Dash comrades are going shop-to-shop terrorising owners by saying they'll go back to war if they don't get a donation. The Cash Baddies, being in government, aren't as pushy since they can treat the exchequer as their personal ATM. The BRB faction, under Financier Minister Comrade Artha Man (Pun Intended) has its fingers on the till, so it doesn't need to extort anyone for now. But PKD's Bash Baddies don't have access to the treasury, so they have also sent letters to big businesses requesting donations, or else.

The Clash of the Titans is getting more intense as BRB and PKD rattle their sabres ahead of their impending showdown. BRB is adding numbers and clout to his camp by not just wooing away PKD loyalists, but also exhorting top comrades from Kiran Kaka's Dashies to defect. BRB is making overt overtures to Comrade Big Plop to join his retinue, dangling carrots in front of his face, and triggering air raid sirens to go off in both the PKD and Baidya camps.

Why was PKD in BKK? That was the question that consumed everyone in Mandu this week. This being Nepal, everyone believed the most conspiratorial theory instead of the official one that Sita was getting a checkup at Bumrungrad. Among the theories:
� PKD was feeling envious that ex-Kingji took his wife to Singapore for her checkup
� Chairman wanted to get back at the president for going off to Delhi for his checkup
� Daddy and Mommy wanted a reunion with Sonny Boy Prakash
� PKD met RAW in BKK
� Thailand has some Awesome beaches
� APECF Consultation
� All of the above

Headlines of the week:
Bhattarai rejects Koirala as PM
Koirala rejects Dahal as PM
Dahal rejects Bhattarai as PM
Koirala rejects Koirala as PM