Kasto kich kich gareko, hairanai paryo buda le!

Exact Makunay soundbite last week before Girija finally bamboozled him into making Suzy DPM. "I couldn't take the pressure anymore," MKN told Ram Chandra and Sushil, "I had to do it to save the government, at least it's not PM, only DPM."

To cut a long story short, GPK blackmailed MKN saying: "I'll join the Baddies and topple you unless you take my dotter as your deputy." MKN resisted, but he had to do it in the end. The donkey's prediction: GPK will
hibernate, lie low and stop hobnobbing with the Baddies till Christmas at least.

The other reason GPK is hibernating is because he was certain he'd get the Nobel Peace Prize, and was upstaged by President O'Bama. Can't blame him for having his hopes up ever since Man Mohan-ji threw him a red carpet at IGIA in 2006 and called him "Asia's great statesman" and then Jimmy ('Jimbo') Carter called him "My Hero".

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What is all this sudden India-China shadow boxing over Nepal? OK, we understand that these two don't like each other and each thinks the other is stabbing it in the back. China does not give visas to Arunachalis, objects to the Indian PM addressing a meeting there, issues visas to those from Kashmir on a separate loose paper stapled to the passport. India competes for resources in Africa, irritates Beijing by continuing to tolerate Tibetan activities in India, has a media that whips up anti-China hysteria regularly.

But what is surprising is that our netas, who have little clue of the larger geopolitics, want to play India off against China. So PKD troops into Beijing with dogmatist-in-chief Com Kiran and operator-in-chief Com Mahara to build 'party-to-party' links. Surya Bahadur Thapa creeps back from Delhi after meeting who-whos, convincing them the Maoists cannot be trusted, as if they needed more convincing. Then Lionheart flies into Delhi to convince them how he is their best bet at the next NC convention, and how he is the logical next compromise PM candidate. Ass' advice: let's stop beating around the bush and just have a direct India-China Summit on Nepal's future. Let's hammer it out once and for all. Once Beijing and Delhi come to an understanding, our domestic jokers will stop all this diplomatic tourism.

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The discharge of disqualified Baddie minors began this week with a grand function at the Sindhuli cantonment. But has it really begun? Noone, including the UNMEAN folks meant to be overseeing the process, quite know. Are the Maoists just using this as a ploy to show progress before the next Security Council meeting, without really going all out to throw out those who had no business being there? Or are they sincere? The day after the event, deputy commander Com Baldev was heard cribbing about the rehabilitation package.

Till we see this disqualified lot in civilian schools we will not believe it. But guess where many of them are headed after leaving the cantonments: a transit centre. This is meant to be a stop-gap arrangement, but are we not creating another structure that will be equally hard to disband?

The international community is getting wise to the ways of our netas. After paying endlessly for various parts of the peace process, the Norwegians have finally issued an ultimatum: they are willing to help with the rehab of the discharged, but only if this process concludes by January 22. If that date is crossed, the promised 5 million smackeroos will be channeled elsewhere.

And where is Com Pasang while all this is happening? The commander of the PLA has been particularly low key. He has not been giving interviews, he was not present at the discharge function; unlike last time, he has not reacted to the defense minister's assertion that the CPA should be revised to bolster the Nepal Army's capabilities. Noone quite knows why he has allowed Baldev to hog the limelight, or whether he has been asked to lie low. Maybe both?

ass(at)nepalitimes.com