Mishal Moktan is originally from eastern Nepal and moved to Kathmandu about five years ago. In that time, she has been unable to find a steady job. Many young women compromise their dignity or sell their bodies in some way to earn money in Kathmandu, Mishal says, which is something she is unwilling to do.
Mishal completed a diploma course in fashion design and now studies at a college in Baneshwor. She is supported in part by an American family friend. She recently travelled abroad for the first time to work as a costume designer and coordinator for a series of music programs in Singapore and Malaysia. She is hoping she will be able to continue doing this kind of work.
She has lived alone for many years in a rented room, though her father has recently joined her for an extended stay.
"Before I came to Kathmandu, I was very fat. When I lived in the village, I had to do a lot of work, so I ate a lot. Because I ate a lot, my body became bigger. I was probably 60 or 65kg then." |
"In Kathmandu more than trying to lose weight, I didn't eat on time. When I was studying I was alone, I didn't feel like eating. I only ate Rara noodles." |
"Before, when I was very fat, I did want to become thin, but I never wanted to become too thin. There was a lot of fat on my stomach, and I would have liked to have lost that weight." |
"I got ulcers in my stomach. I would only eat rice once in two or three days. I had to study a lot, too, and even though I didn't eat, I wouldn't be hungry. And after not eating well, I became unbalanced." |
"Now, I think a healthy, fuller body is better. Before, when I was fat, I never got fevers or got sick. The cold wouldn't get to me. Now I am trying to gain weight! Really!" |
"Right now I am 40 or 41kg. I've put on about 1kg recently, within the past month. |
"There is a big difference between the old me and the new me. I never used to talk and I was always afraid. But now when I run into someone on the street, I speak with them, and I have a lot more confidence." |
"In my experience, no matter how many people I meet, they all want to become slim, because it's fashionable. They want to copy other people. All of the heroines are thin and slender. In Kathmandu, 50 or 60 per cent of girls, and women, too, want to become slim." |
" I'm not satisfied with my body or my face. When I look in the mirror, I don't like the external shape or the structure of my face. I think I look skinny, like a tall, thin bamboo shoot. I think that it was better when I was a little fat. Actually, I don't look in the mirror much. If I look in the mirror too much, I get mad." |
"After I moved to Kathmandu, I began to realise how people perceive you. If you sit silently, people have certain ideas about you. I learned how to speak with different kinds of people. I became more comfortable with myself than before. I have a lot more confidence than I had before." |