Nepali Times
ASS
Backside
Taking on the Almighty

ASS


After placing their political appointees in the national airline, handing supporters ambassadorships, vice-chancellorhoods, padding the bureaucracy, and trying to get the army chief sacked, the Maoists seem to have bitten off more than they can chew by taking on God.

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Being atheists, the comrades probably didn't realise they were meddling with the Lord of Animals. The Baddies have now collectively earned so much bad karma that they risk being reborn as tapeworms in their next life. By sacking Indian priests we also exposed ourselves for tit-for-tat expulsions of Sister Nirmala and Nepali high priests of Rameswaram and Kasi Vishwanath. Operation Mul Bhatta seems to have been purposely timed to embarrass the prime minister during a week when everyone knew Mulayam would be in town at the invitation of the president to pay homage to Pashupati. And Govinda and Shabana would also be around. Otherwise, why sack the priest now?

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Five months after Comrade Pukada stated that the YCL had changed and would henceforth be engaged in helping the people with development works, the ex-gorillas this week hacked off both legs of a UML supporter. Looks like the leopard has changed its spots into stripes, and has now become a tiger.

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And we thought Terrifying said last week he was not going to any more inaugurations, ribbon cuttings and lamp lightings. But there he was on Thursday jumping off a cliff on a paraglider. All domestic flights were diverted because a VVIP was freefalling somewhere over Kot Danda. But we should give the man a break, as it were, because he has been through one too many political cliff hangers lately.

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At the rate PKD and GPK hit it off every time they meet, the Ass' theory is that the real danger of the Maoist-led govt being toppled comes not from the opposition kangresis or the UML comrades pulling the plug on them but from their own restless commanders. At a gathering in Naya Bajar this week to plan for the PLA Day parade in KTM on 13 Feb, division commanders are said to have used undiplomatic language to shake Awesome down.

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The warlike warlords weren't really so worried about the party's ideological purity, but about their own salaries and perks. Also, we now have a clue as to why Kali Bahadur Kham was never arrested for terminating Ramhari Shrestha because the commander of the PLA 3rd Div was the only one who spoke up in support of the Supreme Commander at that meeting.

ass(at)nepalitimes.com



LATEST ISSUE
638
(11 JAN 2013 - 17 JAN 2013)


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