Your weekly Ass rarely gets its facts right, preferring to bend them every week on this space. So it wasn't surprising that it got its backside namesake kicked last week by irate readers about the report that Matrika Babu had set an example for the class struggle by travelling economy roundtrip to Bangkok for a health checkup.
It turns out the Minister of Jungles was actually on business class with his better half (Seats 1J and K) and his retinue was at the back on steerage with the citizen journalist who reported this to us. What perplexes the Ass is: aren't the Gangalals and the Norvics of this country good enough for Comrade Rumble in the Jungle? Wonder if sick recruits in the cantonments will also get the same commune equality treatment in Bumrumgrad?
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Comrade Ian must be doing something right, given how he is being clobbered by both royalists and Maoists. Last week's issue of the CPN-M mouth organ (Janadesh, not Gorkhapatra) sent vicious barbs directed at the UNMIN Chief, his interviewers in the cantonments accusing them of asking hostile questions. Janadesh even insinuated that there had been some inter-national canoodling inside containers.The same week, rightwing blogs erupted in a blistering attack on UNMIN and Ian's perceived mollycoddling of Maoists. The Ass's take on this is that UNMIN is falling into the same trap as the Norwegians in Sri Lanka where the rebel movement arm-twisted supposed peace monitors to get its way by threatening to abandon the peace process. It's pretty clear who is holding up the third round of verification and why, and it's time UNMEAN stop beating around the bush.
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The reason Comrade Fearsome is obsessed with DDR and SSR could be because both acronyms have a Stalinist ring to them: Deutsche Demokratische Republik and the Soviet Socialist Republic. One sure sign of desperation on the part of the comrades is the open attack on our colleagues at the Himalayan Times and Annapurna Post. Could this be a case of shooting the messenger before elections? The Ass's prognosis is the comrades will follow through with their threats to quit the government ahead of elections since an anti-incumbent advantage is the only thing that will save them. The Fierce One will dump Laldhoj if it gets too hot at the plenum......
Word reaches us that whatever might have been happening at Lord's cricket ground with the Indian tourists, the spirit of the game was not observed during our head jarsap's visit to the UK. Politeness and due protocol were much in evidence at the FCA and MoD but fair play and the ability to duck at the crease was not. The nasty opening ball was an Isabel Hilton op-ed in the Guardian that served as a curtainraiser for the visit. Hilton attacked our COAS as being a man who talked and promised a lot about reform and change but delivered little. It got a lot worse in the meetings were beamers and bouncers were the order of the day. Katuwal Jarsap was caught off silly point and even before the first over. Ouch. I say old chap, it's hardly cricket......
What the Asinine One finds ironical is that while the British press was accusing Katuwal Jarsap of mass disappearances, three weeks earlier sections of the Swiss media were also calling Chairman Lotus Flower a "butcher" in Berne. With human rights violators like these in power, no wonder truth and reconciliation is in no one's agenda. Meanwhile, disinformation via cyberspace is reaching a frenzy: the Maoists' Zurich connection got a flurry of email cross-postings by a Buddhist Swiss, the improbably named Halshi Bash, about a vast red stash of ill-gotten wealth in Credit Suisse. As we go to press, bloggers from left field have launched a counter disinformation campaign. 
