Among the many things we do to make visitors to Nepal more than welcome in Shangri-la is the ritual organised by the Department of Imitation requiring all inbound passengers arriving on the shores of our Landlocked Himalayan Kingdom to mandatorily hand in autographed Disembarkment Cards. Failure to do so results in an on-the-spot fine in cash or kind of an amount not exceeding $100 (in unmarked $10 bills plus 10 percent VAT and 2 percent Tourist Tax), or defenestration from aircraft at an altitude of 35,000 ft over waypoint Romeo, or both.

The existing Disembarkation Card is a fine document, and we would be hard put to improve on the typographical oddities, quaint syntax and exotic grammar contained therein. However, there is always room for refinement and we have taken the liberty of presenting below a modified sample form with suggested answers for your future reference during 2003, which as you may have already figured out from the title of this piece, has been declared Visit Nepal (Or Else) Year. In this way, NTB can glean more relevant information from visitors about just why it is that they want to visit Nepal when the rest of the world is keeping away: